How to Write Literary Agent Queries That Get Requests and Representation

You've written a book. Now you need an agent. But agents don't accept manuscripts—they accept queries. And most writers approach queries backwards. They summarize their plot like a Wikipedia entry, list themes nobody asked about, or write something so vague it could describe any book. Then they wonder why they get form rejections.

A query letter isn't a summary. It's a pitch. You have 250-300 words to make an agent want to read your pages. That means opening with a hook that creates immediate intrigue, focusing on stakes not themes, showing your voice without being gimmicky, and personalizing in a way that demonstrates genuine research.

This guide walks through how to write query letters that actually get requests—from structure and word choice to personalization strategies to common rejection reasons. You'll learn what agents look for, how to present your book compellingly, and why your bio matters more than you think.

Why Most Queries Get Rejected in 30 Seconds

Agents receive 50-200 queries per week. They spend about 30 seconds on each one. If your query doesn't hook them immediately, it's a pass. Here's what gets queries rejected fast:

Generic opening. Starting with "I am seeking representation for my novel" wastes your most important sentences. Agents know why you're emailing them.

Plot summary instead of pitch. Listing what happens chronologically ("First this happens, then that happens") without establishing stakes or intrigue reads like a book report, not a pitch.

Focusing on themes over plot. "This is a story about love, loss, and redemption" tells agents nothing. Every book is about themes. What actually happens in yours?

No personalization. Mass-sending the same query to all agents signals you haven't done research. Agents can tell.

Wrong word count or category. If your "literary fiction" is 45,000 words or your YA is 150,000 words, that's an automatic pass. Know industry standards.

Voice doesn't match genre. A thriller query written like a academic paper or a literary fiction query that reads like a sales pitch. Voice mismatch = rejection.

Successful queries hook agents immediately, focus on conflict and stakes, demonstrate market awareness through comps, and show the author understands the business of publishing.

The Query Structure That Works

Here's the format that lands requests. Don't get creative with structure—use what works:

Paragraph 1: Personalization (2-3 sentences)

Why you're querying THIS agent. Reference specific clients, recent sales, or their stated interests. Show you've done research.

Bad: "I think you'd be perfect for my book."

Good: "I'm seeking representation for my psychological thriller. Given your work with Sarah Chen's THE DARK HOURS and your recent interview about wanting more twisty domestic suspense, I thought you'd be interested in my manuscript."

This proves you know their list and understand why your book fits.

Paragraphs 2-3: The Pitch (5-9 sentences total)

This is your hook, conflict, and stakes. Open with your protagonist in action or facing the central conflict.

Structure:

• Who is your protagonist? What do they want?
• What's standing in their way?
• What choice or challenge do they face?
• What happens if they fail?

Example (thriller):

"FBI profiler Maya Rodriguez thought she'd left her past behind until a serial killer starts recreating murders from her father's case—the one that destroyed her family twenty years ago. Each victim bears her father's signature, but he's been dead for a decade.

When the killer contacts Maya directly, offering clues only she would understand, she's forced to confront the possibility that everything she believed about her father's death was a lie. With the body count rising and evidence pointing to someone inside the FBI, Maya must decide how much of her own truth she's willing to destroy to catch a killer who knows her better than she knows herself."

Notice: Clear protagonist, specific conflict, personal stakes, compelling hook. No theme discussions, no backstory, just forward momentum.

Paragraph 4: Comparative Titles (1-2 sentences)

Two books your work will appeal to. Be specific about why.

Bad: "Fans of Stephen King and Gillian Flynn will love this."

Good: "DARK FAMILY SECRETS will appeal to readers of Karin Slaughter's THE GOOD DAUGHTER for its damaged-but-determined FBI protagonist, and Lisa Jewell's THE FAMILY UPSTAIRS for its twisted family secrets and unreliable narrator."

You're not comparing your quality to these authors—you're positioning your book in the market.

Paragraph 5: Bio (2-4 sentences)

Relevant credentials, publications, personal connection to the story.

Strong bio:

• "I'm an MFA graduate from Iowa Writers' Workshop with stories published in [literary magazines]."
• "As a former FBI agent, I drew on my 15 years investigating violent crimes."
• "My essays have appeared in The New York Times and The Atlantic."

Weaker but acceptable bio:

• "I'm a member of Sisters in Crime and attend the annual ThrillerFest conference."
• "This is my first novel. I live in Portland with my dog."

If you have no writing credentials, keep the bio short and emphasize any relevant life experience that connects to the book.

Paragraph 6: Closing (1-2 sentences)

Word count, completion status, pages included (if requested in guidelines).

"DARK FAMILY SECRETS is complete at 85,000 words. Per your guidelines, I've included the first ten pages below. Thank you for your consideration."

That's it. Professional, brief, respectful of their time.

Writing the Hook: Opening With Stakes, Not Setup

Most writers bury their hook under backstory and world-building. They think agents need context. They don't. They need intrigue.

Bad Hook Patterns

Starting with the ordinary world: "Emma has always been a good student. She loves her family and dreams of becoming a doctor." This is setup. Who cares? Get to the conflict.

Opening with rhetorical questions: "What would you do if you discovered your entire life was a lie?" Agents hate this. Just tell the story.

World-building dumps: "In the kingdom of Zephyria, where magic users are hunted and dragons rule the skies..." Unless the world-building IS the hook (rare), lead with character and conflict.

Good Hook Patterns

Protagonist facing an impossible choice: "When sixteen-year-old Maya discovers her ability to heal also shortens her own life, she must choose between saving her dying sister or living long enough to graduate high school."

High-stakes inciting incident: "Detective Sarah Chen has solved 47 homicides. But when her own daughter goes missing and evidence points to Sarah's involvement, she has 72 hours to find the real killer before she's arrested for murder."

Character in conflict: "Corporate lawyer Jordan prides himself on never losing. Until his latest case requires defending the man who killed his brother—and winning might be the only way to catch the real killer."

Pattern: [Protagonist] + [unique situation] + [impossible conflict] + [what's at stake]

Comparative Titles: The Strategic Choice

Comps are more important than most writers realize. They show agents you understand the market, know where your book fits, and have realistic expectations.

How to Choose Comps

Published within 3-5 years. Older comps suggest you're out of touch with the current market. Exceptions: true classics that everyone knows.

Similar in one of three ways: Content (same type of story), tone/voice (similar feel), or audience (same readers). You don't need all three—one strong similarity is enough.

Mix success levels. One bestseller (shows market exists) + one mid-list or recent release (shows realistic positioning). Comping only to huge bestsellers seems naive.

From traditional publishers. Self-published books don't count unless they've sold exceptionally well and gotten traditional deals.

In your actual category. Don't comp adult literary fiction to YA just because it's popular. Agents know genres.

How to Present Comps

Bad: "This is for fans of Harry Potter and The Hunger Games." (Overdone, vague)

Better: "Readers of CHILDREN OF BLOOD AND BONE and A DEADLY EDUCATION will enjoy this." (Appropriate to category, recent)

Best: "This will appeal to readers of V.E. Schwab's THE INVISIBLE LIFE OF ADDIE LARUE for its magical realism and centuries-spanning romance, and Erin Morgenstern's THE STARLESS SEA for its lush prose and labyrinthine mystery." (Specific about why)

Always explain the similarity. "Fans of X" tells agents nothing unless you say why.

What If You Can't Find Comps?

You can. You're not looking hard enough. Expand your thinking:

• Look at books in your genre from the last 3 years on bestseller lists
• Check Goodreads lists and recommendations
• See what agents you're querying have sold recently
• Consider books similar in tone even if plot differs
• Think about audience overlap, not just content

If you genuinely can't find comps, that might mean there's no market for your book. Or you're in the wrong category and need to reconsider positioning.

Personalization: What Actually Works

Personalization isn't optional. Mass-querying gets mass rejection. But most personalization is either fake or excessive.

Good Personalization

Reference specific clients: "I'm seeking representation for my historical fiction. Your work with Lisa Wingate on BEFORE WE WERE YOURS inspired me to reach out—like Lisa's novel, mine explores family secrets and adoption through dual timelines."

Mention their stated interests: "On your agency website, you mentioned wanting more feminist retellings of fairy tales. My novel reimagines Sleeping Beauty as a political thriller."

Connect to recent sales: "I saw you recently sold [Book] to [Publisher]. Given the similar themes of identity and belonging in my manuscript, I thought you'd be interested."

Bad Personalization

Generic flattery: "You're my dream agent!" or "I love your taste in books!" This sounds desperate and empty.

Oversharing: "I heard you speak at a conference three years ago and it changed my life." Too much.

Fake connections: Mentioning a client you clearly haven't read. Agents can tell.

No personalization: Starting with "Dear Agent." Instant rejection.

Where to Research Agents

• Agency websites (client lists, about pages)
• Publishers Marketplace (recent sales)
• QueryTracker or AgentQuery (agent databases)
• Twitter/social media (agents' wish lists, MSWL hashtag)
• Acknowledgments in books you're comping to
• Writer's Market guide books

Spend 10-15 minutes researching each agent before querying. Find one genuine connection to your work. That's the personalization.

The Bio: What to Include (and What to Skip)

Your bio does more work than you think. It establishes credibility, shows you're part of the writing community, and sometimes provides the human connection that tips an agent toward yes.

What Strengthens a Bio

Writing credits: Publications in literary magazines, online journals, anthologies. Even small publications count. List the strongest 2-3.

MFA or writing education: If you have it, mention it. Especially prestigious programs (Iowa, Michigan, etc.).

Relevant professional experience: If your thriller is about lawyers and you're a lawyer, say so. If your memoir is about addiction recovery and you're a counselor, mention it.

Awards or recognition: Writing contest wins, residencies, fellowships, grants.

Writing community involvement: Membership in professional organizations (SCBWI, MWA, RWA), participation in workshops, attendance at conferences.

What to Skip

Irrelevant jobs: Unless your day job connects to your book, agents don't need to know you're an accountant.

Apologizing: Never say "this is my first novel" or "I know I'm new to this." Be confident.

Personal details with no connection: "I have three kids and love hiking" doesn't help unless your book is about parenting or hiking.

Self-published work (unless successful): Only mention if you sold 5,000+ copies or got significant recognition. Otherwise skip it.

If You Have No Credentials

That's okay. Keep the bio short and focus on any relevant life experience:

"As a former foster child, I drew on my own experiences navigating the system. I live in Chicago." Short, relevant, done.

Or even simpler: "This is my first novel. I live in Portland and teach high school English." Honest and straightforward works.

Common Query Letter Mistakes

Too long. Queries should be 250-400 words max (excluding subject line and salutation). More than one page is too long. Be ruthless with cuts.

Rhetorical questions. "What would you do if...?" "Have you ever wondered...?" Agents hate these. Just tell the story.

Starting with backstory. Don't explain the protagonist's childhood unless that's where your book starts. Begin with the conflict.

Describing themes instead of plot. "This is a story about identity and belonging" tells agents nothing. What actually happens?

Comparing yourself to famous authors. "The next Donna Tartt" or "Stephen King meets Margaret Atwood." Sounds arrogant, not confident.

Mentioning movie potential. "This would make a great film!" Let agents think that—don't say it.

Typos and errors. Proofread obsessively. One typo might slide. Multiple = rejection.

Wrong agent's name. Double-check you're emailing the right person. Calling them the wrong name is instant rejection.

Real Examples: Queries That Worked

The Clear Stakes Query

Literary fiction query opened: "When Emma's dementia-stricken mother confesses to a murder Emma never knew about, Emma has two choices: report her mother and spend her final coherent months in prison, or cover it up and live with the truth that her devoted mother might be a killer."

Clear conflict, impossible choice, emotional stakes. Multiple agents requested. Book sold in a two-book deal.

The Voice-Driven Query

YA contemporary query opened: "I've always been good at being invisible. Then Lucas Knight noticed me, and suddenly invisible wasn't an option anymore. Neither was telling him the truth: that the reason I'm so good at disappearing is because I've spent three years hiding from my father."

Voice comes through immediately. Teen protagonist's perspective is clear. Conflict and stakes are obvious. Landed agent within two months.

The Strategic Comp Query

Historical fiction query: "Comp'd to Kate Quinn's THE ALICE NETWORK for its dual-timeline structure featuring female spies, and THE NIGHTINGALE for its exploration of women's roles in WWII resistance."

Specific, accurate comps that showed understanding of market. Agent was actively looking for this type of book. Signed within three weeks.

Key Takeaways

A query letter is a pitch, not a summary. You have 250-300 words to hook an agent with conflict and stakes, not themes and backstory. Open with your protagonist facing an impossible situation, focus on what's at risk, and show voice through word choice without being gimmicky.

Structure matters: personalization showing genuine research, hook establishing immediate conflict, pitch detailing stakes and choices, comps positioning your book strategically, bio establishing credibility, and professional closing. Don't get creative—use what works.

Choose comparative titles published within 3-5 years, similar in content/tone/audience, from traditional publishers, and explain specifically why they're relevant. Mix success levels (bestseller + realistic comps) to show market awareness.

Personalize every query by researching agents' client lists, recent sales, and stated interests. Reference specific connections between your book and their representation focus. Generic or absent personalization = rejection.

Keep queries professional, concise, and focused on the business case for your book. Avoid rhetorical questions, theme discussions, backstory dumps, and comparisons to classic authors. Proofread obsessively and follow submission guidelines exactly. Then query widely—10-20 agents for each batch, adjusting based on feedback.